Juice

I love my job. One of my most favorite parts of my job is getting to bring tiny babies home with me. When we admit new babies, one of us International staff members usually cares for them for the first night or two. This allows us to get a good assessment of their needs and abilities so that we can make a good plan of care for them. We really covet this time to get to know each of our kids, and sometimes it extends longer than a few days.

               

       On May 12 we admitted “Juice.” Shortly after bringing him home to my house, there was some confusion with his name that produced the nickname “Juice,” and it just stuck. At 6 months old he weighed 5.5 pounds and was struggling to gain weight at home. Mom was not able to help, and it was becoming difficult for dad to take care of Juice and his tiny twin sister all by himself. Dad had been bringing the twins to our gate for a few weeks prior to his admission, and the babies were in our formula program. Unfortunately, in between appointments with us Juice’s sister passed away at a hospital. Dad was very concerned about Juice, and didn’t want to lose him as well. This led us to decide to admit him into our care for one month so he could gain weight and work on getting stronger. This also gave dad time to grieve his daughter’s death and to develop a good plan for caring for Juice once he brought him back home.

                
 I fell in love with Juice’s tiny self that first night. And since he was only admitted for one month, I decided I wanted him to live with me for the whole month. Juice didn’t know how to drink from a bottle very well; it would take one hour to get him to drink 2 ounces of formula. So, I spent the first few days doing scheduled feedings every 2 hours and teaching him how to suck from a nipple. He did get the hang of it, and eventually got to the point of easily drinking 5 ounces at a time. I carried Juice around in a sling and kept him at work with me until he was drinking well enough to stay with the nannies during the hours I worked. I took him to birthday parties, to church, to do Pilates, to hang out with my friends on the compound. I loved walking over to his room after work and seeing his eyes light up as I reached down to pick him up. He loved to lie across my knees and sway back and forth, suck on his fingers, listen to music, and nap on the tile floor. I got pretty attached to my little Juicer.

        
 Every Friday his dad would come to visit. And there was never a doubt in my mind that his dad loves him. It was the cutest sight to watch dad hold Juice close to his face and sing to him. Each visit I would hand dad a bottle and we would sit together and work on feeding Juice his whole bottle. By the end of June Juice was bigger, stronger, and ready to go back home with his family. His papa came to pick him up on June 25; he weighed in at 8.4 pounds. After prayers, singing, and well-wishes, I choked back tears as we waved good-bye to them.

                

 This past Tuesday Juice’s mom brought him back for his scheduled appointment with us. We were so happy to learn that his mom is also invested in caring for him now. Juice had gained weight at home and looked so content lying in his moms lap. I did hold him for a bit and get some snuggle time :) Juice will continue to be in our Formula program and have appointments with us for the next few months.

Dear Miss Debbie

Dear Miss Debbie,

When Isaiah talks about “His girl,” he’s talking about you. Everyone tells me you two were inseparable. I don’t ever want that to change; you will always be his first love. You raised up a good man; he treats others with respect, is disciplined, follows Jesus, stands up for justice, and is a darn-good linebacker.

He wasn’t supposed to lose his momma at age 22.

I had been saying for a while that the next plane ticket I purchase would be to Virginia. I was right, but definitely not expecting my first trip “home” to be so soon. I knew when I saw the “Call me ASAP” message on my phone that something was seriously wrong. I could hear the fear in his voice as he repeated your doctor’s words. I knew I needed to go.

My stomach was in knots on the plane. I was so eager to see Isaiah; it had been a long six months apart. But, I was nervous about meeting you. Nervous about your health and what I was about to walk into. When I sat down in the chair beside your bed and you looked at me and said “Hi Sweetie,” those knots in my gut calmed down a little bit. And when we sat in the room alone together and talked about your flowers and the boy we both love so much; I knew I was in the right place.

You wanted two things: your baby and your home. I’ll never forget the look of peace I saw in your eyes as we settled you into our own living room and cut the hospital bracelets off your wrists. And my heart melted a little bit each time I caught Isaiah whispering in your ear, holding your hand, kissing your forehead, or reading to you. My heart is so grateful for those moments you two were able to share together.

I quickly learned the ins-in-outs of being your nurse Em. Your friends and family told me you were a diva. And they were right. You liked to watch Judge Judy at 6PM. You only liked to sip water from your red bedazzled tumbler. I was only to use the Olay body soap with the yellow lid for your bath. You liked your wedge pillow under your knees during the day. And I couldn’t forget the incense on your bed-side table.  

I’m usually not an emotional girl, but you got me. I cried the day Isaiah, Grandma Frances, and I gathered around your bed and talked about his childhood.  I cried the night we said our final goodbyes in the living room. I cried as I watched your life celebration video and saw your momma’s tears. I cried when the pastor talked about how proud he is of the son you devoted your life to raising.

I cry for all the time I won’t get to spend with you. For all the questions I won’t get to ask you. For all the “I’m at my wits-end with you son, please talk some sense into him” phone- calls I won’t get to make. For all the celebrations and the sad days you won’t be here for.

You made me promise that I wouldn’t stop for you. You wanted us to keep moving forward with life and pursuing our careers. And it's hard, but here I am, back in Haiti taking care of my babies. 

 I love you Miss Debbie, 

 Em

"The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail." Isaiah 58:11